Tonight

Tonight...

I sit here.... listening to mellow music... feeling warm and cozy in my sweater,

my house, my skin...

yet

there is unrest in my spirit,

in myself,

my soul.

Longing for rest, completion, peace.

Knowing where to find it - not knowing all the time how to reach out and grab it - and make it real for myself.

Trying to understand the inside of myself - my thoughts, goals, dreams, aims, hopes.

Begging for the balm to be on my soul and heal it, make it whole and make it fly to a place of safety, fulfillment, and joy.

Wondering to know how to express joy in myself, for others, for my Creator

Aching to be made whole and perfect in a time not belonging to this earth

Not needing to cry anymore or try to be someone who i'm not,

but longing to know as I am known.