3:59 am...

Whilst most of my adoring public are snoring away in your (hopefully) cool beds, i'm sitting here in the air conditioning (why do i need to put the air on at home when i get free airco here at work?).  It's 3:50 am, and i'm on the tail end of the first of three night shifts.  For some crazy reason, i'm ridiculously awake at present and seem to have gotten my second wind.  Charting about an hour or so ago was a challenge, the last one being pretty rough looking as far as penmanship goes - when i get kinda tired, my pen seems to take on a life of it's own and skitter and scratch its errant way across the page, giving me away as a eye-drooping RN. 
Thankfully, everyone is copacetic so far tonight - a few fevers here and there, but that will be dealt with in the morning - nothing to do right now except fight the sleep battle as valiantly as possible. 
As i sit here, i think that it's been nearly a year since we've been in this new building.  I've never worked in such a new area - but there are definite disadvantages too.  One being that at night, we are so spread out, that i have absolutely no idea what's going on the rest of the ward.  In the old world, we had one nurse's station (and a tiny satellite one), but you got to chat with your co-workers and see how they were doing - how their patients were doing.  That is now all completely gone and i sit alone tonight at the south nursing station, accompanied only by the deep snores of my patient down the hall. 
I've gotten used to the sounds and sights of this place - toilets flushing, patients banging around in their rooms with their iv poles trying to find the bathroom in the dark, beeping of IV pumps, the soft footsteps of my co-workers as they pass me on their way to hunt for some food or maybe a warm blanket. 
I ask myself, do i love my job?  I'm not so sure that i can answer passionately with a resounding yes.  Work conditions the last year have been too stressful and demanding for that.  Working chronically understaffed has its definite drainining qualities on myself and my co-workers.  There are many times i'm thankful that i work only part-time to avoid the stress of being here full-time.  As it is, i feel many times like hugging my co-workers and tellling them they're doing a good job in the face of adversity; maybe one day my rant and rave email will finally make it out there for people to read!  Fat lot of good it would do eh? 
Well, i guess i'd better cut this off for now, my bossy legs have decided to torture me and make me feel like screaming so i'll go for a little stroll and see who's awake!