There's an earwig on my bed, on my bed

(sung to the tune of There's a Spider on my Leg, by Raffi)

There's an earwig on my bed, on my bed

There's an earwig on my bed, on my bed

There's an earwig on my bed, oh i wish that he was dead

There's an earwig on my bed, on my bed.

There's an earwig on my wall, on my wall

There's an earwig on my wall, on my wall,

There's an earwig on my wall, how i wish that he would fall

There's an earwig on my wall, on my wall.

There's an earwig in my tub, in my tub

There's an earwig in my tub, in my tub

There's an earwig in my tub, you're going to die, little bub

There's an earwig in my tub, in my tub.

There's an earwig on my floor, on my floor,

There's an earwig on my floor, on my floor

There's an earwig on my floor, where he comes from, they'll be more

There's an earwig on my floor, on my floor.

There's an earwig on my desk, on my desk

There's an earwig on my desk, on my desk

There's an earwig on my desk, the world's ugliest pest

There's an earwig on my desk, on my desk.

Since my dear friend moved out and here i remain

Earwigs have come to give me some pain

Oh they don't suck your brains or bite in your ears

But their dark little bodies give me some fears.

They crawl round the house and creep me all out

So RAID gets sprayed all over and about.

I'm pro'lly going to die of an overdose of spray

The earwigs will all give a huge "hurray!"

"We've done it my boys, we done it at last,

The human is gone, from our lives it has passed.

We've managed to creep her out to the max

Earwigs are cool, that's the straight facts!"

So before i get carried out of the front door

By a phalanx of earwigs shouting "human no more!"

I'll put up a fuss and spray till they know

That i live here and they've got to go!!!

p.s. if there's ever on here that looks this huge,

the next time you see me, i'll be in Peru!!